Chapter 3 - EPOV

“Edward, what’s wrong?”

“Baby, I’ve gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow. I promise.”

“Thank you, Edward,” Bella sighed.

“I love you, Bella,” I whispered.

“I love you too,” she said before ending the call.

I closed my phone and dropped my head to my hands. How long had Tanya been standing there? I panicked and ran to my bedroom door only to find it locked. I started banging on the door.

“Tanya, open the door.” She didn’t respond. I slid to the floor and dropped my head into my hands. I heard the faint sounds of doors and drawers opening and closing. A strangled sob would make its way through the door every now and then. Twenty minutes later the door opened, and Tanya walked out carrying her suitcase and a box.

I got up and started to apologize, but Tanya cut me off. “I don’t want to hear your apologies or excuses, Edward,” she sighed and turned her back to me. I placed my hands on her shoulders and she stiffened. “Edward, you have never said you love me or called me baby or any other term of endearment. You’ve always called me Tanya.” She drew in a shuddering breath and barely whispered, “Was I just a distraction for you?” Her tears started up full force again.

“Tanya, I’m so sorry. I care very deeply for you, but what we have is the best I have to offer.” I felt her shoulders slump at my words.

“Edward, I love you with all my heart. It killed me to hear you tell her that you would love her forever while you have never been able to tell me that you love me. For the past two years I have been the one warming your bed at night and giving you all of my love and support. Where has she been? She’s been in New York living her life without you. She hasn’t given you a second thought. Bella lives her happy little life with her James not giving you a second thought, while you pine away down here for a woman you can’t have.”

“Get out,” I sneered.

“Don’t worry, Edward. I can’t stay here when you clearly want to be somewhere else, with someone else. Hearing you tell Bella that you love her hurt me more than anything you could’ve done. I suggest you think long and hard before you get involved with anyone else. Until you let Bella go, you will never have a successful relationship.”

Tanya gave me one last disgusted look and walked out of my life. I should’ve been devastated, but I only felt relief. I had been living a lie with Tanya for the last two years. I knew the only reason I continued to lead her on was because she helped me not think about Bella.

Even though I was relieved, I felt like a failure. I had ruined yet another relationship. Honestly, how could I destroy something that never really had a chance to be? Tanya was right. I could never have a relationship with anyone as long as I still loved Bella. There was no way I could ever give my heart fully to someone else. Bella was my soul-mate, and I needed to do whatever I could to get her back.

I didn’t go back to sleep that night. The first flight I could get to Seattle the next day was at nine in the morning. Including the short flight to Port Angeles and the drive to Forks, I would be by Bella’s side by two in the afternoon. She was devastated by the loss of her father, and that asshole James only made that situation worse. I had to get to her and prove to her that I still loved her and would do anything to get us back together.

After I had packed what I would need for the trip to Forks, I searched the EDS website looking for any openings in the New York area. The Manhattan office had just posted the position that I currently held in Dallas. I couldn’t believe it. It had to be a sign that I was meant to get back together with Bella. I sent in my bid for the position and emailed my supervisor, Jay. I let him know that I was taking bereavement leave and about my bid to the New York office. Jay was a stand up guy, so I hoped he would support me in the move and put in a good word for me in New York.

I spent the rest of the morning searching online for an apartment near the New York office. I knew I was getting ahead of myself, but I had nervous energy and a few hours to kill before I needed to leave for the airport. There were quite a few nice places available within a 15 block radius of the office.

***

The drive to the airport was brutal during rush hour traffic. It amazed me how many people were traveling to work at five in the morning. After an hour of stop and go traffic, I made it to the airport. People may have been crowding the highways, but the airport was blissfully empty. I made it through security with no problems and had time to enjoy a cup of coffee while I waited for my plane to board. I was lost in thoughts of Bella when the announcement that my flight was boarding startled me. I grabbed my carry on and quickly made my way to the plane. I breathed a sigh of relief when I settled into my seat and realized there were only a few more hours until I could pull Bella into my arms.

I spent the entire flight to Seattle thinking of Bella and regretting the five years we lost together. We could’ve survived a long distance relationship. I spent my first two years in Dallas missing her. If we had stayed in a relationship, those years wouldn’t have been miserable. I would’ve had her phone calls and web cam dates to get me through the days without her. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t even tried to make it work.

Would that have been enough for Bella? She was the one that showed up to Alice and Jasper’s wedding with him only two years after I had left. I was miserable and lonely those first two years. I was excited for the wedding because I would be able to see Bella again. I couldn’t wait to wrap my arms around her and let her know how much I missed her and how miserable I had been without her. Those plans were shattered when Bella walked in with James holding onto her possessively. I couldn’t help but think that she was obviously getting on with her life just fine without me. That was the worst weekend of my life. Not only did I have to watch James manhandle Bella, but Bella and I had the worst fight we’d ever had.

Three Years Earlier

Bella looked amazing in her short blue strapless bridesmaid dress. I couldn’t take my eyes off her through the entire ceremony. I caught her sneaking glances at me several times. Seeing her again just strengthened my resolve. There was no way I would leave without making her mine again.

I was so lost in Bella that I missed the entire ceremony. I didn’t realize it was over until the audience cheered when Alice and Jasper kissed. I quickly made my way to the reception to wait for the wedding party to appear. I wasn’t going to waste anymore time. The minute Bella walked into the room I would make my way to her and let her know everything I was feeling and how much I missed her. I was on cloud nine just thinking about the sweet reunion with my love. The feeling of euphoria was destroyed the minute she walked in the room tucked tightly into another man’s side.

My heart broke into a thousand pieces when I saw her look up at him and give him a shy smile. That was when I realized that I had waited too long. I had lost her. My knees started shaking and I was gasping for breath. My world was starting to fade when Bella put her hand on my shoulder.

“Edward, what’s wrong?” God, it was so good to hear her say my name.

“Sorry, I haven’t eaten all day and I think it’s finally getting to me,” I lied. I made my way to my assigned seat and cringed when I saw Bella was seated at the same table. This was going to be a long reception.

I spent the first hour catching up with Emmett and Jasper and getting completely shit-faced. I never quite understood why people thought an open bar was a good idea at a wedding reception. Once dinner was finished, Alice and Jasper shared their first dance as husband and wife while I threw back another two shots of Jack. The pain of seeing Bella with another man was finally starting to dull. I looked around the room and two things caught my attention. First, I saw Bella dancing with him. Second I saw a cute brunette eyeing me from across the room. I’d had enough of seeing Bella happy with that guy, so I decided to get to know the cute brunette.

I staggered my way across the room and practically fell into the poor girl. “Hey, gorgeous.”

She was stunned by my forwardness but quickly recovered. “Hey yourself, handsome,” she said, smirking.

“Wanna dance?” I slurred.

She wrapped her arm around mine and led me to the dance floor. A slow song started playing and I had to rely on the girl to help me stay on my feet. I was all over her trying to keep my balance. I looked up to see Bella’s beautiful brown eyes staring at me in complete pain. I couldn’t understand why she was hurting. She was the one who showed up with the tool. I wrapped my arms around the brunette tighter, pulling her closer to me. I lowered my lips to her neck and started placing light kisses up to her ear. She giggled and ran her hands down my back and grabbed my ass. Bella’s eyes started to tear up and she ran off the dance floor into the bathroom with Rose and Alice right behind her.

I felt like a total ass. I hadn’t gone there to ruin Alice and Jasper’s wedding. Of course, my original plan was shot to hell when Bella brought a date. I unwrapped my arms from the brunette and excused myself. I was heading toward the bathroom Bella disappeared into when Emmett and Jasper stopped me.

“Dude, I don’t know what the hell you did to her, but you need to back off.” Emmett grabbed my shoulder to stop me.

“All I did was dance with a girl. Is that so wrong? She’s here with someone, why can’t I enjoy myself?” I swayed as I spoke.

“Edward, you’re drunk. I think you need to sit down and have a cup of coffee,” Jasper said, shaking his head.

At that moment Bella walked out of the bathroom. Her eyes were puffy and red. She looked at me with a murderous glare. I cringed when we made eye contact. She stomped her way to where I was sitting.

“Edward, can I please have a word with you?”

I shrugged my shoulders. “Sure. What’s up?”

“Outside. Now,” she seethed.

I rolled my eyes and staggered my way out of the ballroom. I heard the door close behind me and I turned to see an irate Bella.

“What the hell is your problem, Edward?!”

“What is my problem?” I laughed.

“Yes. You are making a complete fool of yourself in there. You are drunk and pawing that poor girl.”

“Trust me, she wasn’t complaining. I seem to remember a time when you liked my touches.”

She narrowed her eyes at me and slapped me across the face. I started laughing. “You were never this feisty before, Bella. I think I like it. It’s really turning me on.” I staggered toward her and she stepped back until I had her pinned against the wall. I dragged my hand up her arm, across her shoulder, and finally cupped her neck. “Bella, you used to love it when I’d trail kisses from your neck to your ear.” I lowered my lips to her neck and started to demonstrate for her when she shoved me away. I stumbled back and fell onto a bench.

“Edward, what the hell happened to you?”

I laughed humorlessly. “What happened to me?” I scoffed. “Let me see. I spent the last two years miserable and lonely. I missed the love of my life. I kept beating myself up for pushing her to take a job I knew would tear us apart. I came to my friend’s wedding hoping to fix the shit storm I caused only to find the love of my life happily hanging on the arm of some douche. Basically my heart was broken for the last two years, but tonight, sweetheart, you destroyed it.”

Bella dropped her head and took in a shuddering breath. “Edwa-”

I stopped her before she could finish what she was going to say. “Don’t, Bella. I can’t take your pity. Just go back to the douche. I’ll just go back to my life and forget I ever knew you.” I turned and walked away from the only woman I would ever love.

My life was changed that trip, but not the way I’d hoped. I had planned on coming home and having a relationship with Bella. I hadn’t planned on totally destroying any relationship we had left. I moped around and berated myself for a week before I got the nerve up to apologize to Bella. She of course refused to answer my calls, so I had to leave my apology on her voice mail. She never returned my calls, but she did send me an email. She told me that she was very sorry for the fight we had and that she hoped I had a nice life.

I was a miserable bastard the next three months until I met Tanya. She brought me out of my funk and helped me cope without Bella in my life. Unfortunately for Tanya, her presence was only suppressing my feelings for Bella. She kept my mind occupied so I didn’t think about Bella or how much I missed her. I knew seeing me with Tanya really bothered Bella, but she acted like an adult and graciously welcomed Tanya to our circle of friends.

After Bella met Tanya, we started sending emails again. I was happy knowing what Bella was doing. We would call every few months and talk for a few hours. Those conversations always left me depressed. I would think about how much I missed her and have a nice time with my buddy Jack Daniels. Tanya never could figure out what the reason was behind my occasional drinking binge. I would never tell her.

I felt a hand gently shake my shoulder. “Sir, we’ve arrived.” The flight attendant smiled seductively at me.

“Sorry, I was lost in my thoughts.”

“That’s quite alright, sir,” she purred. I quickly gathered my things and exited the plane before she could give me her phone number.

I picked up my rental and flew from Port Angeles to Forks. I couldn’t wait to see Bella and pull her into my arms. I still couldn’t believe James was such a cold-hearted bastard. I hoped she made it out of New York without him being too much of an asshole to her.

I finally pulled into her parent’s driveway and breathed a sigh of relief. I quickly made my way to the door and knocked. Renee slowly opened the door and threw her arms around me the moment her eyes settled on my face.

“Oh, Edward. You don’t know how much it means to me that you came.”

I threw my arms around Renee and returned her embrace. “I’m so sorry about Charlie. Did Bella make it here alright?”

Renee sniffed. “Yeah. She’s up in her room. Please come in.” Renee opened the door wide and motioned me in. I’d only been in this house a few times, but it felt like I was coming home. Renee and Charlie had always made me feel so welcome.

“Do you have a hotel room?”

“Not yet. I was in such a hurry to get here that I figured I could take care of that once I was here.”

“Well, since you don’t have anything reserved yet, you will stay here with us.”

“I couldn’t impose on you like that, Renee.”

“Nonsense. It’s no imposition. You are family, Edward. Charlie wouldn’t want you staying in some lonely hotel room.” Renee started to tear up when she said Charlie’s name.

“Thank you, Renee. I’ll try to stay out of your way.”

“Edward, you won’t be in the way. Why don’t you go upstairs and see Bella. I know she’s been eagerly awaiting your arrival.”

I gave Renee another quick hug and started up the stairs. I paused to look at one of the pictures hanging on the wall. It was one of Charlie and me on my second visit. We were sitting in the back yard drinking beers and smiling. I blinked back my tears. I couldn’t believe they kept a picture of me hanging in their home.

I jumped when I felt a hand rest on my shoulder. “He was so happy that day. When we got the pictures developed, he insisted that we blow it up and frame it. Charlie refused to take it down after you and Bella broke up. He loved you like a son.” Renee handed me a tissue and continued past me up the stairs to her room and shut the door behind her. I took a deep breath and continued my journey to Bella’s room.

I lightly knocked on Bella’s door. “Bella, baby, are you awake?” I got worried when I didn’t hear an answer. I very quietly opened the door and saw Bella curled in the middle of her bed. She was awake but her eyes were red and puffy and she was staring into space. I closed the door behind me and sat next to her on the bed.

I started stroking her hair. “Baby.”

Bella looked in my eyes and jumped into my arms. “Oh, Edward. I can’t believe he’s gone,” she sobbed. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into my lap.

“Shh, baby. I know. I can’t believe it either. I keep waiting for him to open your door and tell me to keep my hands in a respectable place.” She laughed and wiped her nose with a Kleenex.

“Thank you for coming here.”

“There’s no need to thank me. Nothing could’ve kept me away from Forks.”

“Is Tanya with you?” she asked hesitantly.

“No. Tanya moved out last night,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure if I wanted her to hear that.

“I’m so sorry, Edward. It’s all my fault. I should’ve never called you.” She started sobbing again.

I pulled back and looked in her eyes. Her face was swollen and bruised on her left side. I lightly stroked her cheek. “Baby, what happened?”

“I’ve messed up everyone’s lives by calling you. You and Tanya broke up. James went crazy and attacked me. I can’t seem to do anything right.”

I tensed up at the thought of James laying a hand on my precious angel. I could see the fear in her eyes when she saw my clenched fists. Bella cupped my cheek. “Edward, please don’t worry about it.”

“What do you mean don’t worry about it? There is no reason for him to ever lay a hand on you,” I seethed.

Bella’s tears started falling again. “He’s in jail,” she whispered.

“Good. That’s where the bastard belongs.” Bella nodded and laid her head on my shoulder.

“I’m glad you called me. I wouldn’t miss being here with you for anything. It was time for us to part ways. I had never been truly happy with Tanya and that wasn’t fair to her. Right now, I’ve got the only person who can truly make me happy wrapped in arms.”

Bella tightened her hold on me. “Edward, please don’t ever let me go.”

“Never again,” I swore.

We settled into a comfortable position on her bed, and I drifted off into a blissful sleep with the love of my life wrapped safely in my arms.